Author: coldcoffeewithkids

One day. That’s the amount of days we had free of sports related activities we had the first week of the season.

That means all other responsibilities had to fit in the free spaces of that one day. The rest of the week became a juggling act of chores between full time jobs. Sports gear gathering, gear washing, water bottle finding, fill and washing, snack sign up, snack buying, snacking handing out.

But this is the season we‘re in and I wouldn’t change it for a second. I recognize that the days of being sideline fans are short lived in the grand scheme of life. The days of being front row witnesses as our kids develop new skills and achieve milestones will become fewer and further spaced out as they get older. Car rides together, snuggling on the sidelines and hugs after games will be some of the best memories we’ll hold on to forever. Catching their eyes after wins and losses.

So for this season, I will cherish how busy we are. I will be grateful to be able to enroll them in sports that give them these opportunities. Hold on to this season as it flies by. Hold on to your little ones. Hold on to that coffee that’s getting you through those early mornings.

Even if that coffee is cold.

I’ve always been up for a challenge. Going to school full time for my Bachelors (sometimes with a full course load plus another class) while working? Sure! Student teaching while doing my EdTPA certification and planning a wedding? Let’s do it! Having two babies(two full term pregnancies) in less than one year? Whew, yep did that one too. Parenting two toddlers, (step)parenting a preteen and working full time from home with five kids under three years old? Yep!

Adding getting my Masters to that? Yep….then again no. And that’s okay.

Every other time in my life those choices gave me so much joy and I had enough passion to overpower the sheer weight of each of those challenges. That doesn’t mean it was easy to do, it just meant it was worth it. It was worth the late nights, the sacrifices, the cost…and this time it wasn’t. It wasn’t worth missing family movie nights. The piles of laundry or dishes or clutter that built up. The mental load of the tasks of each individual responsibility that weighed heavily on my mind.

It wasn’t worth it.

Not in this season of life.

This season of life is filled with too many moments that I’ll never get back. Too many family game nights. Movie nights. Cuddles. Snuggles. Racing cars on the floor. Building train tracks. Wiping oatmeal handprints off my walls. Sleep regressions and early mornings. And coffee….lots and lots of coffee…

And I don’t want to miss a second of it. I don’t want to miss a smile, a laugh, a moment of family bonding over a board game. My Master’s will always be there. It’s always been an option and it always will be. My children’s childhood is only for so long. And I intend to be present during all of it.

So be present. Embrace the chaos. Scrub the walls occasionally. Prioritize the now and learn to say no to things that can wait. And sip your coffee…even if it’s cold.

As a kid, I always wondered why vacation prep seemed so stressful for my parents. As a parent, I now understand.

Being out of your comfort zone, environment, and routine can be stressful, especially when your kids are small. There’s so much to think about, plan for, pack and prepare for. Extra diapers, wipes, clothes, shoes, gloves, pacifiers, pack and play, blow up toddler bed, pump…the list literally could go on forever.

Then you get on the road and there’s snacks, waters, diaper breaks, diaper leaks, outfit changes, and whining…whew…the whining. It would be so easy to throw on a screen, to hand them something that brings fifteen minutes of peace and quiet. And then suddenly the whining stops, they notice something new out the window, they find something to pass to their sibling and they start to laugh. A song comes on and everyone starts to sing. And dance. And clap. And we laugh. We’ve just made a lifetime memory. Etched a feeling into their heart that they will look back on in their later lives and cherish. And hopefully they’ll recreate for their children and families in the future.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the chaos and hard moments, to forget to relax and enjoy the time together. It’s just a mindset shift. Not many things with little ones will go as planned, but that’s the point. Those plans aren’t nearly as important as the feelings and memories we’ll all be left with. So I’ll enjoy every moment of vacation with these three sweet children. And my handsome Hubby.

And enjoy my coffee from my cup holder…and you can be sure, it’s probably cold.

Screaming babies both demanding attention, mountains of bottles, pumping parts, postpartum body, raging hormones.

Snack cup demands, running in opposite directions, refereeing WWE matches, tantrums.

As soon as I thought I made it through the intense stage of having two babies….now I have two toddlers. A whole. New. Basket. Of. Chaos.

But with every tantrum over nothing choices that are very important to toddlers, I am met with more love, snuggles, sweet words and new discoveries. For every boundary that is pushed, I am met with curiosity and their enthusiasm of new discoveries. And no matter how much chaos, mess, or toys get thrown, I still can’t help watching them while they sleep. Breathing in their toddlerhood. Tearing up because one day they’ll have lives away from home.

So I remind myself to be present. In every moment, good or bad. Chaotic or calm. Messy or clean.

So soak it in Mamas. Drink your probably cold coffee and marvel at these little people that you teach about the world but who also teach us about the world.

Enjoy your babies, these moments and your cold coffee before it gets spilled.

Parent teacher conference time has come and gone again!  Usually this involves walking into a room with three chairs at a kids size table: two for the parents and one for the teacher. A teacher, a well educated stranger you’ve entrusted to teach and inspire your child for 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 9 months of the year.

Our parent teacher conferences look a little different…We have a table set for 5. That’s because there are four parents who attend our conferences. Mom, Dad, Step Dad and Step Mom. Why? Because we all PARENT. We all drive to sports events, pick up, drop off, birthday parties, dry tears, clean out puke buckets, read books, play catch, and make lunches.

It’s no secret to those around us that our family dynamic is much different than many families who co-parent. We randomly get together for family dinners, game nights, Sunday football games and meals, each other’s family parties, and drinks. We laugh together, share struggles together and confide in each other. This is no accident. It didn’t happen easily. But it’s worth every second of effort.

We have all had our share of miscommunications, jealousy, harsh words, overreactions, and space needed to cool down. It takes time. Energy. Sacrifice. Insight. Empathy.

But it’s also become easier. More fun. More relaxing. And more rewarding than I ever could have imagined. We cheer together, laugh together and brainstorm together.

My (step)son’s mother has made me a better person and I’ll be forever grateful for our relationship and experiences together. I look forward to parenting with her, her husband and my hubby. To many more years of games, Birthday parties, dinners, laughter and drinks.

Life isn’t always the picture we imagined as kids, but this has shown me it can be more colorful than we could have dreamed.

Love each other through the hard times and good. And enjoy a good cup of coffee…even if it’s cold. ☕️